Faith and kindness

Faith and kindness

We shared this view, the two girls and their boyfriends at the top of pas du Chevre.
I was crossing the Boulder field that is the route leading up to the pass and this group passed me by in the middle of it.

One of the guys kept looking back as I made my way ahead on all fours. He did not have to. He kept watching till I was on top of the first ladder of the pass. He did not have to.
Small acts of kindness move me deeply. Someone bringing a glass of water when I cannot be bothered, someone fetching an extra raincoat when I couldn’t get mine, someone teaching me the right way to do a thing when they could just pass by, a stranger giving me a kindly pat on the head when they can tell I need it, and someone watching out for me on lonely routes.

It brings me back from the brink everytime. Each time someone acts in kindness they don’t know they are giving me much more. I am bothered by the dependancy and yet I cherish the interaction so much. I am burdened by the compassion shown to me and yet that lights up my world. I am entirely undeserving of this grace and yet it I experience it repeatedly.

Being in the mountains gives me the space to unravel these strands of thought. Here, I search for that the one line of acceptance already written inside me.

Sometimes I look at a great sky to find that bright and indescribable wedge of freedom in my own heart.

In the stillness of the night I lie awake to find if someone has written
something new in the ashes of the fire that has gone out.

In the glory of the morning I wait to hear the mountains sing to me.

And the world works on my behalf catching me in its arms when I go too far.

I don’t know what I could have done
to have earned such faith.

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